Hello Antidepressants

Source: nlm.nih.gov

Source: nlm.nih.gov

Hello Antidepressants.

It seems that my body has finally started getting the hang of you.

Your SNRI molecules are not proving to be half as nauseating as they used to be, and probably not half as painful. If only I were disciplined enough to always take you with the meal, but sadly my more emotional-self does not, cannot, wait long enough at times. Especially when it is getting out of control.

I am still not sure if I can properly work when I am under your influence, or even remain conscious while I am awake. Though I am supposed to be by now. Guess there is no option, but to keep on trying.

I am actually supposed to take you every day. But should I?

But do I want to be under your influence? Tricky question.

The answer is yes, and no.

I can’t say I can withstand the pain you cause, to put up with the debilitating brain zaps, but I can’t say if I want to give up the pleasure of numbness you offer along with it. I can’t say I don’t enjoy the altered electric sactivity disabling the more uncertain parts of myself.

Do I like what you are doing to my brain, and my body?

Again, yes and no.

But that’s why you are supposed to be medication.

I am glad I have a new friend.

I am not saying goodbye to you.

 

Hello Antidepressants.

It’s going to be a lifelong ride.

Advertisements

The Mood to Talk

Source: Gary Busey/NBC/blogna.tv

Source: Gary Busey/NBC/blogna.tv

Someone starting to talk to you about something of your interest is like an appetizer really.

Baiting to make you want to go for more.

But then sometimes they withdraw, or have to.

I know this would sound ridiculous to a lot of people, but it is like coitus interruptus, or someone denying you orgasm after stimulation. Or perhaps leaving you with that terrible urge that chain smokers feel when they have not smoked for a while.

Why would stimulating your brain be any different to stimulating your genitals? Also, why does touching or manipulating your genitals get so much attention and doing the same to your brain does not even get a mention?

It’s just there is no apparent release point of this energy, depending on what kind of energy you are dealing with here.

I know not everyone may have the energy to keep up with the discussion, but this is how it works for some.

I would not mind passing out with an overdose at the end of the day, if you ask me.

But someone rightly pointed out to me.

Wouldn’t it kill the very purpose?